


best thing that's ever been mine

by susanpevensies



Category: AKB48, After School (Band), IZONE (Band), Produce 101 (TV), Produce 48 (TV)
Genre: F/F, otp: pd48 girls/happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 03:52:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15655230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/susanpevensies/pseuds/susanpevensies
Summary: Okay, so they're back to the start again: Kaeun turning on Sakura with a look that could turn her blood to ice. “It’s just a joke,” Sakura manages shakily, but without any real conviction. Kaeun studiously stares everywhere but at another person, and the panic on her face is setting off major alarm bells in Sakura’s head.





	best thing that's ever been mine

**Author's Note:**

> this is just me being disgustingly sappy because of the sakura/kaeun drought ignore me everyone
> 
> i tried to fit in noe/gyuri, chaeyeon/eunbi, sihyeon/juri and more quality ships but i failed enjoy the kaeun/sakura and side wonyoung/yujin because that's all i can write apparently in an hour? this is like an album!signing au ik its lame
> 
> i was inspired largely by [this fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10898232/chapters/24226242) by forthemyoui that you should definitely check out if you're also in the TWICE fandom, it's wonderful [thank you, anon for being so polite, i appreciate it :)] I tried to make this fic as different as possible but if anyone thinks anything is too similar, please point it out so I can revise !!
> 
> as always: [twitter](twitter.com/hufflepuffsuzy) @hufflepuffsuzy [i forgot i had this until two days ago]

“It’s four in the morning,” Wonyoung tells Yujin via FaceTime, her voice tinny and distorted and scratchy from overuse. Yujin sulks, and opens her mouth to say something back, before Wonyoung interrupts again. “You can always finish the autographs after our fansign, Yujinnie.”

The other girls all went back to their dorm, shuffled sleepily to the van by their zombie-like managers, at least two hours ago. Only one of their managers is still here, propped up against the door, dutifully texting one of their event team members about the details of the fansign tomorrow, and the van had returned half an hour ago, even though Sakura’s willing to bet that the driver is asleep by now.

She feels something tighten in her chest when Kaeun passes her the next album without looking at her. _I can’t even do this right,_ Sakura breathes, clicking her pen and pressing the nib to the album cover. Her hand’s starting to cramp. She messes up one of the names, and she quickly blots out the pen marks with her elbow―but Kaeun notices anyway, her eyes sweeping carefully over Sakura’s slanted, messy autographs.

Kaeun doesn’t say anything as she fixes Sakura’s lettering on one of the dedication messages and reaches across the table to stack it on top of her own pile of albums. Sakura’s heart squeezes when she sees how drowsy Kaeun looks, her eyelashes fluttering like butterfly wings. Everyone is getting restless, especially Yujin, who’s been taking lemon-flavored cough medicine for two days―even though she’s perfectly fine keeping Wonyoung up on a FaceTime call―and it can’t be healthy that she’s consistently staying up this late.

“You know what would make me feel better?” Yujin says, tapping screen-Wonyoung’s cheek with her index finger. There’s a long pause, before Wonyoung falls into her trap (...of course she does) and says flatly, “What.”

“A kiss!” Yujin says enthusiastically, eyes shining. There’s an even longer pause, before Wonyoung bops her own head with her fist―as if she regrets encouraging Yujin in the first place―and mutters, “I can’t kiss you through the screen, silly.”

Sakura turns her head a little to the side as Yujin follows up with a cheesy line, squabbling a loud “Sure you can! Give me one reason...” as Wonyoung squawks in mock-horror. She smiles, amused. When she looks back at the dizzyingly high stack of albums left to sign, Kaeun’s face is much closer than it should be.

Their eyes lock, and Kaeun’s eyes widen, just for a second. “We need to go home quickly,” Kaeun says, straightening abruptly and pulling back, that impeccable mask sliding back over her expression. “Here―I’ll help you.”

“You’re sick, unnie,” Sakura mumbles, hand fluttering to Kaeun’s forehead. Her fingers run down her nose, and Sakura ends up smoothing the front of Kaeun’s shirt gently, an uncharacteristic panic seeping into her voice when she says, “You shouldn’t even be here right now. Your forehead’s so warm―”

Kaeun stares at her, face difficult to read with a flimsy mask covering her mouth, and Sakura laughs nervously, folding her hands in her lap. “You’re not working as hard as you used to,” Kaeun says, with more bite than before. It’s the _only_ sign that the long hours are getting to her, and for the first time, both Yujin and Wonyoung are uncharacteristically silent. Sakura jolts, willing her legs to move, and shakily gets up, like Bambi on ice.

“You should go back to the van with Yujin,” she says, putting a hand on Kaeun’s shoulder, the words spilling out into a confused, quiet jumble. Okay, so they’re back to the start again: Kaeun turning on Sakura with a look that could turn her blood to ice. Sakura gets in a confused “I can―finish up by myself,” before she just shuts up and goes back to her seat.

Kaeun exhales slowly through her nose and leans back against her chair, crossing one leg slowly in front of the other and then crossing her arms. It’s so reminiscent of who they were a few months ago, when new episodes were still airing―and when tensions were at an all-time high for all of them, that Sakura lowers her eyes again and backtracks, almost instinctively.

“I won’t leave you here alone,” Kaeun repeats, a little more calmly. Sakura winces when she remembers that Kaeun’s already done with her pile and that she decided to stay with her, out of pity or kindness―or something else, Sakura doesn’t know.

The world rights itself again when Kaeun gives her a blank half-smile, passing her the next album, and Sakura peels herself off the ground quickly and tears a packet of sugar to pour into her coffee―anything to keep herself awake for the next half hour.

There’s something that Kaeun’s not telling her. Back when they were competing, she could glance at Kaeun and see the barely suppressed anger in her eyes, in her steely tone, in the violent twist of her lips when she lost to Sakura―she almost misses those days, because she misses being able to read Kaeun like an open book. She misses being able to empathize with her.

The lines have clearly blurred a while ago. Some things, when they change, never return to the way they once were―their rivalry fizzled, unsurprisingly. Now they’re left with… Sakura’s not sure.

She misses being able to clearly say they were _this_ or _that_ , because now she feels like she’s nothing at all to Kaeun, like they’re stuck in this limbo-esque headspace that makes it weird to define their relationship one way or another. Even though they’re not competing for the same spot anymore, Kaeun still avoids her―they’re friendly when they’re with the other girls, because they’re used to putting on a show in public―but when they’re alone, it’s different in a way that doesn’t sit well with Sakura.

“Why won’t you kiss me back?” Yujin cries out loudly, and Wonyoung’s voice tapers off in frustration, “I _can’t!_ ” Their manager rolls her eyes as Wonyoung huffs out angrily, “I’m gonna go to bed, I’ve waited for two hours―”

“Kaeun unnie,” Sakura whispers, as Kaeun continues to sign Sakura’s photocards. “Do you know what might make me sign faster?”

“I’m all ears,” Kaeun sighs, not entirely paying attention. She raises an eyebrow when Sakura drops her pen, and immediately swoops down to retrieve it, setting it in Sakura’s open palm. She sort of looks at Sakura, confused but not completely disinterested. “What is it?”

“A kiss,” Sakura says, giving Kaeun a smug, self-satisfied smile before she manages to stop herself―it’s exactly the type of thing she would say to throw Kaeun off, but it feels wrong now, judging by how Kaeun’s jaw works hard before her face crumples completely.

“It’s just a joke,” Sakura manages shakily, but without any real conviction. Kaeun studiously stares everywhere but at another person, and the panic on her face is setting off major alarm bells in Sakura’s head. “Kaeunnie?”

Sakura feels her chest flip funnily when Kaeun finally pulls herself together and says tightly, “Right.” Kaeun hauls another stack of albums to the other side of the room, and then continues signing like nothing happened, flicking through the folders at record speed.

“What, do you want a gold star?” Kaeun snaps after a moment, feeling Sakura’s eyes on her. Her eyes flicker to the last pile. “Finish signing so we can all go home and rest.” Kaeun wavers on the last word, coughing for the first time. “Please.”

“Sorry,” Sakura says, making a small noise and not meeting Kaeun’s eyes, “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you would take it so seriously―”

“I…” Kaeun swallows. She looks like she’s on the verge of passing out, and Sakura’s heart is starting to beat out of her chest. Kaeun snaps to attention again, squaring her shoulders, “You still shouldn’t treat people’s feelings so carelessly. It’s not right, and it’s not…” She chooses her words carefully. “It’s not like you.”

“Oh,” Sakura says quietly. She feels like she’s teetering precariously on a wire when she finally says, “If you weren’t sick, I would, okay?” She feels Kaeun freeze up next to her, giving her a disbelieving-slash-amused look, but for a few moments, she’s afraid that Kaeun’s actually going to slap her―Sakura finishes earnestly with, “If that would make you feel better, unnie.” Good. Classy.

Kaeun’s eyes dart to Sakura’s face, and then she says, “Liar,” with a playful little half-smile. Kaeun stills as Sakura closes the distance, breathing in a scent that - after all these months - has become unfamiliar but remains comforting. Kaeun’s fingertips slip across Sakura’s cheekbones, skating under her eyes ― still adorably open ― and Sakura feels warm all over, even when Kaeun untangles herself from Sakura and pulls the mask over her face again.

“Feel better?” Sakura asks softly, placing a hand on Kaeun’s neck to check for her fever. “You’re not burning up anymore.” She tacks on a snarky, “I wonder why _that_ is,” and Kaeun bursts out laughing, surprising both of them, before covering her mouth with her hand.

“Shut up,” Kaeun mutters, on the verge of losing it for whatever reason, but when she thinks Sakura isn’t looking, she smiles with her eyes. It’s like she’s relieved, almost, and Sakura can relate―oddly enough, this feels like it’s been coming for a long time. There are some things they still have to talk about, but they have all the time in the world―or at the very least, the next four hours before the other girls start to wake up. “Just sign faster now, okay?”

Sakura’s hand moves at record speed and within the next fourteen minutes, she’s gotten through the last stack. Their manager is―by this point―pretty much catatonic on the tiles of the kitchenette, and Yujin’s arms tremble when she hauls the woman up and props her against the wall.

“Finally,” Yujin says grumpily, slinging her backpack over her shoulder and fiddling with the Baskin-Robbins coupons in her wallet. “Wonyoung’s asleep already.”

“You only finished thirty minutes before us,” Sakura reminds her, standing up and pulling at Kaeun’s hand absentmindedly. She sticks out her tongue at Yujin, who does it right back.

“You were still slower than Kaeun unnie, who’s sick,” Yujin retorts.

 _Not anymore,_ Sakura thinks, tightening her grip on Kaeun’s hand. “Can we just go,” Kaeun mutters, pushing the door open. Yujin starts to drag their staff member through the doorway, and Sakura puts an arm around Kaeun’s waist to support her.

“You two are disgusting,” Yujin says happily as she skips down the stairs, two at a time.

Kaeun opens her eyes, looking weird and murderous, and gives Yujin a withering look. “Thanks,” she mutters sleepily, and Yujin throws up her hands, her backpack almost falling off her shoulders. “It’s true! Wonyoung hung up because of you two―” Yujin huffs when she catches Sakura and Kaeun giving her the most hilarious look, and speed-walks to the van, slowing down when she discovers that the driver has, predictably enough, face-planted against the driver’s wheel.

When Yujin’s standing at the very tip of the curb, Sakura gives her the tiniest shove humanly possible, and Yujin flails, resembling like a fish gasping for air for a moment, before regaining her balance and punching Sakura in the shoulder.

Kaeun starts laughing so hard that she actually has to be helped into the van, but not before pulling on Sakura’s shoulder on her way up and kissing her so deeply that Yujin almost starts to hyperventilate.

 

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos are always lovely and appreciated, ESPECIALLY the former ♡ also a shoutout to @inmylife, who is writing [this interactive fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13433049/chapters/35271893) re-make of pd101 s1 that you should read and vote for to save some of your (and my!!) favorite trainees


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